Sigh. 

Yesterday, we were at the ER again. A praise was that our fav ER doctor - Dr. Jorge - was on again. 

His bicarb stayed a 19, which is good in some ways, extremely stressful for us in other ways. It’s stressful bc it’s on the low end and we know how quickly Zeke can lose bicarb. 

We could not receive bicarb in the ER - there are a couple of reasons that I don’t have the wherewithal to write here, and we can’t be admitted with a bicarb of 19. This is another both/and for us. We are so happy that he is not vomiting and miserable AND we are perplexed and concerned that his bicarb dropped so quickly within a week. We are thrilled to be in the hospital AND anxious bc we don’t know when/if there will be a big drop that puts Zeke in the danger zone. 

We do feel really heard and seen by Dr. Jorge, which is one reason we like him so much. He was even willing to consult with Dr. Baron, who was on in the PICU and knows our case well. As a team of 3, we did come up with a discharge plan we felt comfortable with (even though I’m still a little nervous) but I’m choosing to praise God for 2 doctors who truly listen, care and are well informed.

So we are home. Zeke had a good night. Praying that all we have been doing will be enough for his body to create enough bicarb to not go back to the hospital. 

Yesterday, as we were preparing to go to the ER, I was sobbing as I cried out to God. When I had no words, I turned on one of our fav worship playlists and my favorite song of the moment came on.

“Your ways are higher, you know just what I need. I trust you Jesus, you see what I cannot see.” 

This is repeated over and over and I’m repeating it over and over as well. He knows just what I need. What Zeke needs. What Jon needs. What Zane needs.