A recap and where we are right now
In support of
Brian Hoehler
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Brian Hoehler
*We thought it would be fun to share a few pictures of his CPD days!* The day he graduated from the academy, one from his middle days, and the very last day he was in uniform <3
We are still learning how to answer the innocent and sincere question of "How are you?" There is that split second before the words come, when your mind hesitates in need of having your pain witnessed and the innate desire to protect those who are asking from the raw truth. It is a balance yet unlearned.
It brings to mind the poem
"For when people ask"
By Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer
I want a word that means
okay and not okay,
more than that: a word that means
devastated and stunned with joy.
I want the word that says
I feel it all at once...
Where we have been; This is a record for us as well as you...When we wonder why our heads are spinning, and we are exhausted...
We are still learning how to answer the innocent and sincere question of "How are you?" There is that split second before the words come, when your mind hesitates in need of having your pain witnessed and the innate desire to protect those who are asking from the raw truth. It is a balance yet unlearned.
It brings to mind the poem
"For when people ask"
By Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer
I want a word that means
okay and not okay,
more than that: a word that means
devastated and stunned with joy.
I want the word that says
I feel it all at once...
Where we have been; This is a record for us as well as you...When we wonder why our heads are spinning, and we are exhausted...
August 9, 2026: Brian felt sick with fever and confusion; went to the hospital ER, admitted with a near-septic UTI, mentioned a small swelling in his neck, CT scan of head/neck revealed a 3.5 CM necrotic lymph node (with several others) in his neck-determined to be malignant/cancer.
8/10: Scan of abdomen- no other lymph nodes indicated, but lots of inflammation internally in the pelvic area; possible prostate cancer in addition and separate from neck cancer; in extreme pain.
8/11: Biopsy of throat/tongue (during a CODE RED weather shutdown at the hospital!)
Confirmed cancer. (Side note: Dr Bear, ENT, was absolutely amazing and wasted no time getting this done)
8/12: Released from hospital, still suffering terribly in pain. We had not even wrapped our minds around the diagnosis because he was suffering so much with the UTI and consequences of that.
8/15: Went back to the hospital due to inability to urinate and extreme pain. We have such conflicting feelings about Mercy West right now. I honestly hope to never need to take him in there again. The doctors and several of the nurses were amazing. I hesitate to give the names of individuals because we are still reeling from some actions. Like me having to walk him down a LONG hallway, holding nearly all his weight because he could barely walk due to the pain, instead of them putting him on a bed for transport... or once we were finally in a room, a nurse insisting on small talk before they would provide a catheter (after it had already been aproved) and failing to acknowledge the urgency of the situation while he layed there shaking, sweating and begging for relief. It was 45 minutes before they finally helped him. Got a Foley catheter that would remain for nearly a week.
8/16: He taught his class and preached at church.
8/17: ENT appointment with his regular ENT, Dr Bear(Mercy)
8/18: ENT surgeon appointment, Dr. Zender (UC)
8/19: Spent his last day letting his counseling clients know that he would be taking a leave.
8/20: Urologist appointment, Mercy; catheter removed.
8/22: We were able to go see our four granddaughters perform in their play! Peter Pan Jr. Such a bright light in a dark week!
8/23: He taught his class and preached at church. ( He amazes me how he is able to study and prepare for this in the midst of everything else <3)
8/25: PET SCAN. Yep, still cancer in his throat. Oropharyngeal (head and neck) cancer, squamous cell carcinoma to be exact.
With the addition of an SUV score of 24 in his pelvic/prostate area. We need to put this information on the shelf for now...
8/10: Scan of abdomen- no other lymph nodes indicated, but lots of inflammation internally in the pelvic area; possible prostate cancer in addition and separate from neck cancer; in extreme pain.
8/11: Biopsy of throat/tongue (during a CODE RED weather shutdown at the hospital!)
Confirmed cancer. (Side note: Dr Bear, ENT, was absolutely amazing and wasted no time getting this done)
8/12: Released from hospital, still suffering terribly in pain. We had not even wrapped our minds around the diagnosis because he was suffering so much with the UTI and consequences of that.
8/15: Went back to the hospital due to inability to urinate and extreme pain. We have such conflicting feelings about Mercy West right now. I honestly hope to never need to take him in there again. The doctors and several of the nurses were amazing. I hesitate to give the names of individuals because we are still reeling from some actions. Like me having to walk him down a LONG hallway, holding nearly all his weight because he could barely walk due to the pain, instead of them putting him on a bed for transport... or once we were finally in a room, a nurse insisting on small talk before they would provide a catheter (after it had already been aproved) and failing to acknowledge the urgency of the situation while he layed there shaking, sweating and begging for relief. It was 45 minutes before they finally helped him. Got a Foley catheter that would remain for nearly a week.
8/16: He taught his class and preached at church.
8/17: ENT appointment with his regular ENT, Dr Bear(Mercy)
8/18: ENT surgeon appointment, Dr. Zender (UC)
8/19: Spent his last day letting his counseling clients know that he would be taking a leave.
8/20: Urologist appointment, Mercy; catheter removed.
8/22: We were able to go see our four granddaughters perform in their play! Peter Pan Jr. Such a bright light in a dark week!
8/23: He taught his class and preached at church. ( He amazes me how he is able to study and prepare for this in the midst of everything else <3)
8/25: PET SCAN. Yep, still cancer in his throat. Oropharyngeal (head and neck) cancer, squamous cell carcinoma to be exact.
With the addition of an SUV score of 24 in his pelvic/prostate area. We need to put this information on the shelf for now...
8/26: He took his NCE (National Counselor Exam)...He needed a 93 to pass; he scored a 112! We are all so stinking proud of him! This was supposed to be the end of two very hard years of sacrifice for our whole family...our I, our adult children, and our eight grandbabies have been counting down the days to when PawPaw was done with school and ONLY had his two full-time careers to share his time with. He has never once neglected his family or community while maintaining his 3.95 GPA (he is a little salty about his 2-point deficit here LOL)
8/27: He was scheduled for a QUAD SCOPE to determine if a TORS surgery was an option to remove the cancer to hopefully avoid the chemotherapy part of the journey. We waited 8 hours for the operating room to be available for his scheduled 10:30 procedure. He was put under with an expected 1-1.5 hours to complete the QUAD SCOPE. I was called to the consult room 12 minutes later. They discovered what our gut had already told us. He is NOT a candidate for the surgery. The cancer is too far down his throat, and he has some physical features in his mouth that make it impossible for them to feel confident in removal.
8/29: WCPO interview and his GRADUATION PARTY! It was a wonderful day surrounded by our community and being able to celebrate him and all he has worked so hard for! So thankful for this day and all who made it possible.
8/30: He taught his class and preached at church.
8/31: Radiology Oncologist appointment, Dr. Medek, UC- that was a very hard set of doors to walk through. It is beginning to feel real now.
Dr. Medek was hoping he would fit the criteria for a trial she is doing that would reduce the amount of radiation needed...it seems like the specific chemo required for this trial causes hearing loss, and with his mastoidectomy in childhood and lifelong hearing loss, it does not seem possible that this will work for him. Not a solid no yet, but a very strong not likely. This means full radiation and chemo :(
She and her resident reiterated what a tough road this is going to be...That seems to be the only constant that has not wavered in this so far...we just keep hearing that over and over...
9/1: Dental appointment for radiation clearance...we knew we would run into issues here. Had a little breakdown in the office...it was bound to happen. Sorry, Dr. Hubbell Smith :/ Thanks for being so kind and gracious. Surgery consult for removal sent.
9/2: Spent the day with grandbabies <3
9/3: Dental appointment to have one tooth crowned and repaired. Removal of 3 others scheduled.
SHEWWWW!!! Okay, breathe. That was A LOT.
Here is what we have coming up...
9/4-6: We will be spending a few days in one of our favorite places in the world...The Nowhere Else Music Festival with a few hundred of our friends ;)
We gift these tickets to each other at Christmas, and we are SO incredibly thankful for that forethought this year. It is a blessed reunion on what feels like Holy ground. It will strengthen our souls for what we are heading into. There still may be a spot or two if you want to join in. You won't regret it.
https://www.nowhereelsefestival.com/
9/10: Sim CT appointment to make his custom thermoplastic mesh mask for radiology. UC and Speech therapist appointment-UC
9/11: Dental surgery appointment to remove 3 teeth
9/12: Helping with a funeral for our friend and church member
9/13: Will teach and preach a sermon at church (countdown to 3 remaining: 9/13, 9/20, and 9/27)
9/14: Oncology appointment to set treatment plan in place (simultaneously with radiation)
Week of 9/21...Treatment expected to begin. Praying there are no delays; we are ready (are we?) for the next phase to begin...feels like a lifetime.
10/1: Urology appointment at UC to discuss results and further testing.
All this while still juggling and sifting through the big lives that we have: church, family, Table of Hope (navigating the big changes happening here is a full-time job), ministry, each other, figuring out the convoluted web of insurance/medical coverage, who/what is covered/not covered/who is billed/who is paying, who is in network, yet refusing to treat, who is out of network, yet willing to treat...we are well over $200,000 in and quickly growing...THANKFULLY, we have sought and found guidance to help us figure out the nightmare aspect of this diagnosis.
Don't ever think it can't/won't happen to you or your family. If you have donated even $1.00, YOU have helped us carry this enormous burden. There are not enough words of gratitude. But please know, we are eternally grateful. It is hard to explain all the details that make that help necessary, but we are happy to have a conversation if you have questions.
If you are still here, we cannot express to you what your support has meant to us in what has been a confusing and honestly scary chapter of our lives. We still have so many questions, but what we know for sure is that this IS and WILL BE hard, and that we WILL BE okay. There is no way of knowing what "Okay" looks like at this point, but one of our favorite quotes is "Day by day and night by night we were together, all
else has long been forgotten by me" ( We were together, I forget the rest)
We are already longing for the day when we can look back and say this.
Thank you for your prayers, your very real and needed financial support, and your overwhelming words of love and encouragement.
8/27: He was scheduled for a QUAD SCOPE to determine if a TORS surgery was an option to remove the cancer to hopefully avoid the chemotherapy part of the journey. We waited 8 hours for the operating room to be available for his scheduled 10:30 procedure. He was put under with an expected 1-1.5 hours to complete the QUAD SCOPE. I was called to the consult room 12 minutes later. They discovered what our gut had already told us. He is NOT a candidate for the surgery. The cancer is too far down his throat, and he has some physical features in his mouth that make it impossible for them to feel confident in removal.
8/29: WCPO interview and his GRADUATION PARTY! It was a wonderful day surrounded by our community and being able to celebrate him and all he has worked so hard for! So thankful for this day and all who made it possible.
8/30: He taught his class and preached at church.
8/31: Radiology Oncologist appointment, Dr. Medek, UC- that was a very hard set of doors to walk through. It is beginning to feel real now.
Dr. Medek was hoping he would fit the criteria for a trial she is doing that would reduce the amount of radiation needed...it seems like the specific chemo required for this trial causes hearing loss, and with his mastoidectomy in childhood and lifelong hearing loss, it does not seem possible that this will work for him. Not a solid no yet, but a very strong not likely. This means full radiation and chemo :(
She and her resident reiterated what a tough road this is going to be...That seems to be the only constant that has not wavered in this so far...we just keep hearing that over and over...
9/1: Dental appointment for radiation clearance...we knew we would run into issues here. Had a little breakdown in the office...it was bound to happen. Sorry, Dr. Hubbell Smith :/ Thanks for being so kind and gracious. Surgery consult for removal sent.
9/2: Spent the day with grandbabies <3
9/3: Dental appointment to have one tooth crowned and repaired. Removal of 3 others scheduled.
SHEWWWW!!! Okay, breathe. That was A LOT.
Here is what we have coming up...
9/4-6: We will be spending a few days in one of our favorite places in the world...The Nowhere Else Music Festival with a few hundred of our friends ;)
We gift these tickets to each other at Christmas, and we are SO incredibly thankful for that forethought this year. It is a blessed reunion on what feels like Holy ground. It will strengthen our souls for what we are heading into. There still may be a spot or two if you want to join in. You won't regret it.
https://www.nowhereelsefestival.com/
9/10: Sim CT appointment to make his custom thermoplastic mesh mask for radiology. UC and Speech therapist appointment-UC
9/11: Dental surgery appointment to remove 3 teeth
9/12: Helping with a funeral for our friend and church member
9/13: Will teach and preach a sermon at church (countdown to 3 remaining: 9/13, 9/20, and 9/27)
9/14: Oncology appointment to set treatment plan in place (simultaneously with radiation)
Week of 9/21...Treatment expected to begin. Praying there are no delays; we are ready (are we?) for the next phase to begin...feels like a lifetime.
10/1: Urology appointment at UC to discuss results and further testing.
All this while still juggling and sifting through the big lives that we have: church, family, Table of Hope (navigating the big changes happening here is a full-time job), ministry, each other, figuring out the convoluted web of insurance/medical coverage, who/what is covered/not covered/who is billed/who is paying, who is in network, yet refusing to treat, who is out of network, yet willing to treat...we are well over $200,000 in and quickly growing...THANKFULLY, we have sought and found guidance to help us figure out the nightmare aspect of this diagnosis.
Don't ever think it can't/won't happen to you or your family. If you have donated even $1.00, YOU have helped us carry this enormous burden. There are not enough words of gratitude. But please know, we are eternally grateful. It is hard to explain all the details that make that help necessary, but we are happy to have a conversation if you have questions.
If you are still here, we cannot express to you what your support has meant to us in what has been a confusing and honestly scary chapter of our lives. We still have so many questions, but what we know for sure is that this IS and WILL BE hard, and that we WILL BE okay. There is no way of knowing what "Okay" looks like at this point, but one of our favorite quotes is "Day by day and night by night we were together, all
else has long been forgotten by me" ( We were together, I forget the rest)
We are already longing for the day when we can look back and say this.
Thank you for your prayers, your very real and needed financial support, and your overwhelming words of love and encouragement.
Isaiah 43:2
New American Standard Bible
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
Nor will the flame burn you.🙌🙏❤️
And through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
Nor will the flame burn you.🙌🙏❤️
Several people have asked for an address for cards: <3
Brian Hoehler
3707 Edgewood Drive
Cincinnati, Ohio 45211
Jalal Hoehler
about 2 months ago
Comments
Deb Coffey about 2 months ago
Lisa Ellis about 2 months ago
Michelle Richards about 2 months ago
Melanie Bardua about 2 months ago
Melinda Fisher about 2 months ago
Lisa Ellis about 2 months ago