For over a week now, our house has been filled with the noise and chaos that comes with having three small children under one roof. At times it's been overwhelming but it's mostly brought a deep sense of relief. The feeling of being home, even in the chaos of life, cannot be replaced.

Zeke had his first outpatient visit on Friday, January 12th. It was intimidating and scary, especially after our visit to the Emergency Department, where they had to access his port multiple times. We quickly learned that the chemo nurses are experts at swift, painless port access. People say you never forget your nurses and now I see why. They are cut from a different cloth, amazing and kind. Capable and gentle. I will never be able to express the gratitude I feel for every single person at CHOA.

In the weekend following Zeke's chemo, our home was filled with big emotions and insatiable hunger. Both from the steroids and both were side effects we knew were coming. At first, taking medicine was a struggle but Zeke has taken up a spirit of resilience, choosing to get it over with, rather than avoid it. We bought some snow cone syrup to mix his medicine in, which has been a small win. Blue raspberry is his favorite flavor and, while its definitely not healthy, I am less afraid of the blue dye #1 than I am the consequences of not getting his steroids in him. 

This week, we are learning and watching for new rhythms. Rhythms where we learn how chemo will affect his body, where we learn which post chemo days will be the hardest and where we learn how to work, while also teaching preschool. We definitely aren't thriving but we are surviving. Honestly, I will take it. 

Thank you so much for all the ways you are leaning in. We truly cannot stand without the help of our community around us. We love you. We are so grateful for you. 

What we are praying towards//
-Continued prayers towards favorable genetics and a clear (leukemia cell free) bone marrow draw on Feb. 2nd.
-Zeke is a fraction of the funny, happy boy he was. We are praying that his personality and joy will, eventually, return full force. 
-An ease in Zeke's pain. He can barely walk like he use to, as the chemo brings weakness and joint pain. 
-That we (Sarah + Bryson) would see God so tangibly in this. Not just His amazing people (our amazing community) but that we would see HIM. His face.