Waves on my head.

Well, Anwyn is officially 11 years old! We celebrated her birthday yesterday, and somehow I also managed to get quite a bit done around the house. Laundry, dishes, bathroom cleaning, and a bunch of those miscellaneous little chores that collect on every surface until you finally get sick of looking at them. I even had a brief visit with a friend, which was really nice. Of course, the day didn't end there. I wound up at the University of Minnesota Medical Center emergency department with a kidney stone. Thankfully, it appears I passed it, and there was no evidence of a remaining stone in my kidneys or bladder. The staff were really wonderful, and I left feeling like I'd been thoroughly and compassionately cared for. I'm especially grateful that I won't be needing kidney stone surgery just days before beginning cancer treatment. THAT would have been a rather unfortunate scheduling conflict!

Tuesday, October 20th, I begin Keytruda immunotherapy, and Friday the 23rd I'll meet with the surgical oncologist. I'm genuinely eager to get started with treatment, and probably even more curious about that surgical consultation. We know surgery is part of the plan, but I'm anxious to understand exactly what that entails, how extensive it might be, what recovery could look like, and how it all fits together with immunotherapy. I have questions, and I'm looking forward to having an actual conversation about the possibilities rather than just imagining them.

Heiko continues to be an amazing source of support and strength through all of this. We're still physically apart, but he's very much present in my everyday life. I appreciate him more than I can really put into words. The laughter, the crying, the conversations about everything and nothing, and the times when we simply exist together without needing to fill the silence. There's something wonderful about being able to share all those versions of ourselves with another person. I love him dearly, and I'm so grateful he's my husband.

Now, something I've been thinking about lately that has absolutely nothing to do with medical appointments, but quite a bit to do with living through all this: groceries.

HOLY CRAP, when did convenient food get so expensive?!

I've always been pretty comfortable in the kitchen. I usually make meals from some form of scratch, even if that just means throwing together a few ingredients and calling it dinner. But between the extra pain I've been dealing with, the medications to manage it, and the fatigue, I'm finding that cooking isn't always something I can realistically manage anymore. Some days I can do quite a bit, and other days standing in the kitchen preparing a meal is simply more than I've got in me. So I've been trying to find things that are easy to prepare, reasonably nutritious, actually taste good, and that Anwyn can safely make for herself when necessary. Microwave meals, ready-to-eat foods, frozen things, whatever works. The sticker shock has been something else, though. Paying so much more for food that requires so much less effort on my part feels ridiculous, even when I understand exactly why I need it.

I've considered making large batches of soups and freezing them in individual containers. I actually like that idea quite a bit. Homemade, affordable, easy to reheat, and generally a decent way to get something nutritious into us. The challenge is having the ingredients, the energy, and the physical ability to do all the cooking on the same day. Turns out that's not always an easy combination to arrange! So this means that I'm looking for suggestions! Do you have a favorite frozen meal, easy-to-make food, or something you keep on hand for days when cooking just isn't happening? Bonus points if it's affordable, kid-friendly, and doesn't taste like the cardboard box it came in. I'm genuinely interested in what other people have found that works.

I think one of the more surprising parts of all this has been discovering just how much of everyday life depends on being physically capable of doing things you never really gave much thought to before. Not necessarily the big stuff, either. Sometimes it's just figuring out what the heck to make for dinner.

Anyway, that's a little glimpse into life around here this weekend. I'm relieved about the kidney stone, happy we got to celebrate Anwyn's birthday, grateful for my husband, and very much looking forward to getting this cancer treatment underway.

Thank you for continuing to follow along with us, and for the kindness and support we've received. 💜