I just met Dr. Mitchell in the hallway. He’s headed down to do the aspiration and bone marrow biopsy.

Crystal went to grab us dinner, and I’m sitting here in the cafe with a massive headache from crying so much. It was a traumatic separation. It never gets easier.

Watching her—gripped with sky-high anxiety and absolute terror—as she was taken from me into a completely sterile environment by strangers … it shattered me. She was so afraid. And I was completely helpless.

I just wish there was something more we could do.

I’m planning to talk to Dr. Herman afterwards. Avry is completely immune to both of the sleeping meds—they do absolutely nothing. We need a better plan. This should not be the way it has to go every time.

I feel like I’m pretty strong through everything… except this.

Crys gently reminded me that being strong doesn’t mean I don’t break. That sometimes being strong is allowing myself to feel it all—the helplessness, the heartbreak, the grief.

And tonight… I’m feeling every bit of it.

-Rose