How Can I Begin To Thank You
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Lady Collins
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Lady Collins
One of my favorite songs by Bethel Music, Back To Life says,
"How Can I Begin to Thank You for all that you've done for me
Jesus to fully praise you, it will take all eternity
Just like Lazarus, you brought me back to life!
The Enemy thought he had me, but Jesus said, You are Mine!"
These words cannot be more true today than ever before!
When I was in college, the story of Lazarus coming up and out of the grave gripped my heart and drew my attention. So much so, that I attributed the most pivotal point of my faith journey to this day at the Passion Conference in 2010. That day, I decided it was time to leave the mess of death from my sin behind and walk in the light of new life with Jesus. I cannot tell you how healing this realization was for me. Healing from wounds I carried in my heart and the shame from the guilt of giving in to sinful nature thinking I was too far gone. But Jesus! He defied the odds and has been faithful over and over again.
Dan and I keep a journal of all of the ways the Lord has miraculously been faithful to our family since we got married. It really started before that but when we decided it was time to get married, that was the next most pivotal moment in my faith journey. I fasted and prayed leading up to our wedding ceremony day and quickly realized how strong prayer and constant communion with God is to our daily walk and unity in the spirit. So we have written record as a reminder of God's faithfulness, not just for us but for our children too. We learned as a couple to fully surrender everything (finances, jobs, kids, car, house, life, health, relationships, etc) to the Lord. Living with open hands makes it easy to continue to say, "Hineni (Here I Am - Send Me Lord)."
With recent events in the world as the evil is being exposed and Christ followers are being openly persecuted for what we believe in, it is for such a time as this, that we are to rise up as the army of Christ in prayer and worship. Our battle, as we know from the scriptures, is not against flesh and blood. I have joked recently that I have a permanent "helmet of salvation" now that I have a partially prosthetic skull.
In full transparency, I felt paralyzed. I felt paralyzed when I was in the MRI machine during my ER visit in July realizing that this "bump" on my head was no small thing. I felt paralyzed when my uncle Julian passed away suddenly and I had the opportunity to speak at his funeral and minister to my family. I felt paralyzed as a young girl when I was lied to by the person that was supposed to be my protector. I felt paralyzed as a college student when I was sexually assaulted by my best friend. The enemy really thought he had me, "BUT JESUS SAID YOU ARE MINE." Most recently, I felt paralyzed when Satan used a young deceived man to murder another man, Charlie Kirk. Do not be deceived. The enemy came to steal, kill and destroy. Let us not be so paralyzed that we can't find hope or stand firm on the word of God. From Genesis 1, God had a redemption plan. Jesus came to fulfill the story and flip the wicked script. Jesus changes everything. We know what is coming and we know how to respond. Be set apart, holy, sacrificially ready, righteous, victorious, and acceptable unto the Lord. It has been imparted on my spirit since early June that we all have clear instructions from the Lord to bring Him glory with our lives but it might look different for each one of us.
So, as we move on to our frontline, battle ground, and suit up (some of us with new shiny armor), remember that He is so worthy. Jesus is so worthy of our full surrender and obedience. We love you Jesus and it will truly take all of eternity to thank you - the community that surrounded our family during our trial as the hands and feet of Jesus! Truly. I am so incredibly humbled and overwhelmed by your goodness, kindness and sweetness toward our family. Thank you so very much!
An eternal life with Jesus is a life worth living, fighting for, and standing up for to say, "Hineni!" No matter the cost. Death is not the end.
I had several doctor visits last week and most importantly a follow up with my neurosurgeon, the wonderful, the legend, the chosen one, Dr. Benjamin Zussman. He was pleased with my healing and my progress. He cleared me to drive and to go back to work! I still have to wait a little while before going back to my infrared sauna work outs and to swimming. Also, no hand stands, tackle football or sky diving in my future, but he said, "this is just a weird chapter and you can move on to finding your new normal now." So, I'll take that and be more than normal! It has been such a joy for me to be back at work this week doing what I love! Although, I do miss staring out my windows and seeing my hummingbird friends every day. I am so thankful to have a sweet nook in our home where we can retreat, recover and meditate on the goodness of the Lord.
Astonishingly, my muscles are figuring out how to relax on their own but my left temporalis is still acting a little haywire and will twitch randomly. My surgery involved several large muscle groups surrounding the left side of my head (front, back, side - all of them) and had to be cut then reattached to the new skull. It still feels sore near my jaw when I attempt to open my mouth big to bite sandwiches, tacos or to yawn but I am so thankful that I am able to chew! I regained the weight I had lost!! I started wearing glasses again which triggers some pain near the left side where it is still slightly inflamed. But the swelling has gone down significantly. At times, I feel somewhat like a robot because I can hear clicking and movement from my new skull, but Dr. Z reassured me all of this is normal and will settle over time. I still need to make gentle movements with turning my heading, leaning forward and looking back at things. Sleep is getting better as it is still an adjustment but I am starting to lay on my left side a little more comfortably. Lastly, I will have annual MRI's to monitor the area behind my left ear (fibrous dysplasia) and my prayer is that we will not need any further interventions. I have a couple follow up appointments with other specialists to monitor some things here and there, but I have been a good patient and have been taking the time to care for my health overall.
Stay tuned my friends, our house is a house of worship and prayer and we cannot wait to host our next prayer gathering! We love you!
Be blessed with eternal hope,
Lady
"How Can I Begin to Thank You for all that you've done for me
Jesus to fully praise you, it will take all eternity
Just like Lazarus, you brought me back to life!
The Enemy thought he had me, but Jesus said, You are Mine!"
These words cannot be more true today than ever before!
When I was in college, the story of Lazarus coming up and out of the grave gripped my heart and drew my attention. So much so, that I attributed the most pivotal point of my faith journey to this day at the Passion Conference in 2010. That day, I decided it was time to leave the mess of death from my sin behind and walk in the light of new life with Jesus. I cannot tell you how healing this realization was for me. Healing from wounds I carried in my heart and the shame from the guilt of giving in to sinful nature thinking I was too far gone. But Jesus! He defied the odds and has been faithful over and over again.
Dan and I keep a journal of all of the ways the Lord has miraculously been faithful to our family since we got married. It really started before that but when we decided it was time to get married, that was the next most pivotal moment in my faith journey. I fasted and prayed leading up to our wedding ceremony day and quickly realized how strong prayer and constant communion with God is to our daily walk and unity in the spirit. So we have written record as a reminder of God's faithfulness, not just for us but for our children too. We learned as a couple to fully surrender everything (finances, jobs, kids, car, house, life, health, relationships, etc) to the Lord. Living with open hands makes it easy to continue to say, "Hineni (Here I Am - Send Me Lord)."
With recent events in the world as the evil is being exposed and Christ followers are being openly persecuted for what we believe in, it is for such a time as this, that we are to rise up as the army of Christ in prayer and worship. Our battle, as we know from the scriptures, is not against flesh and blood. I have joked recently that I have a permanent "helmet of salvation" now that I have a partially prosthetic skull.
In full transparency, I felt paralyzed. I felt paralyzed when I was in the MRI machine during my ER visit in July realizing that this "bump" on my head was no small thing. I felt paralyzed when my uncle Julian passed away suddenly and I had the opportunity to speak at his funeral and minister to my family. I felt paralyzed as a young girl when I was lied to by the person that was supposed to be my protector. I felt paralyzed as a college student when I was sexually assaulted by my best friend. The enemy really thought he had me, "BUT JESUS SAID YOU ARE MINE." Most recently, I felt paralyzed when Satan used a young deceived man to murder another man, Charlie Kirk. Do not be deceived. The enemy came to steal, kill and destroy. Let us not be so paralyzed that we can't find hope or stand firm on the word of God. From Genesis 1, God had a redemption plan. Jesus came to fulfill the story and flip the wicked script. Jesus changes everything. We know what is coming and we know how to respond. Be set apart, holy, sacrificially ready, righteous, victorious, and acceptable unto the Lord. It has been imparted on my spirit since early June that we all have clear instructions from the Lord to bring Him glory with our lives but it might look different for each one of us.
So, as we move on to our frontline, battle ground, and suit up (some of us with new shiny armor), remember that He is so worthy. Jesus is so worthy of our full surrender and obedience. We love you Jesus and it will truly take all of eternity to thank you - the community that surrounded our family during our trial as the hands and feet of Jesus! Truly. I am so incredibly humbled and overwhelmed by your goodness, kindness and sweetness toward our family. Thank you so very much!
An eternal life with Jesus is a life worth living, fighting for, and standing up for to say, "Hineni!" No matter the cost. Death is not the end.
I had several doctor visits last week and most importantly a follow up with my neurosurgeon, the wonderful, the legend, the chosen one, Dr. Benjamin Zussman. He was pleased with my healing and my progress. He cleared me to drive and to go back to work! I still have to wait a little while before going back to my infrared sauna work outs and to swimming. Also, no hand stands, tackle football or sky diving in my future, but he said, "this is just a weird chapter and you can move on to finding your new normal now." So, I'll take that and be more than normal! It has been such a joy for me to be back at work this week doing what I love! Although, I do miss staring out my windows and seeing my hummingbird friends every day. I am so thankful to have a sweet nook in our home where we can retreat, recover and meditate on the goodness of the Lord.
Astonishingly, my muscles are figuring out how to relax on their own but my left temporalis is still acting a little haywire and will twitch randomly. My surgery involved several large muscle groups surrounding the left side of my head (front, back, side - all of them) and had to be cut then reattached to the new skull. It still feels sore near my jaw when I attempt to open my mouth big to bite sandwiches, tacos or to yawn but I am so thankful that I am able to chew! I regained the weight I had lost!! I started wearing glasses again which triggers some pain near the left side where it is still slightly inflamed. But the swelling has gone down significantly. At times, I feel somewhat like a robot because I can hear clicking and movement from my new skull, but Dr. Z reassured me all of this is normal and will settle over time. I still need to make gentle movements with turning my heading, leaning forward and looking back at things. Sleep is getting better as it is still an adjustment but I am starting to lay on my left side a little more comfortably. Lastly, I will have annual MRI's to monitor the area behind my left ear (fibrous dysplasia) and my prayer is that we will not need any further interventions. I have a couple follow up appointments with other specialists to monitor some things here and there, but I have been a good patient and have been taking the time to care for my health overall.
Stay tuned my friends, our house is a house of worship and prayer and we cannot wait to host our next prayer gathering! We love you!
Be blessed with eternal hope,
Lady
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Lina Bartingale
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