Support Registry Update

WHY NOT YOU Part 1

In support of
The Castillo Family
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Yesterday, when we found out there was more cancer, I was… devastated. Heartbroken. Livid. All I could see was red. I want to move forward toward healing—not be dragged, kicking and screaming, backward.

On top of all those “Hulk” feelings, I’m also sad and emotionally struggling as I prepare to be “unpacked” and see myself for the first time at my one-week post-surgery appointment. That appointment is today.

Since surgery, sleep has been a mess—not consistently bad, but unpredictably so. Some nights I’m awake until 3 a.m. Other nights, I fall asleep by 10, only to wake up every 30–45 minutes, and by 8 a.m., I’m up for good—not because I’m rested, but because I’m just thattired and uncomfortable. Last night was no different. I couldn’t sleep until nearly 3:30 a.m. I honestly don’t know how, considering how mentally and emotionally drained I am. What’s crazier is that I woke up at 8 to take my medicine, and I could feel myself happily drifting back to sleep—but then, I wasn’t. I’m here, typing this.

The past 12 hours have been full of prayers like: I love you, God, but why me? I trust You, but why is this happening? I have faith, but why are You allowing this, Lord?

And then, at 8:20 this morning, I felt a big nudge—something that jolted me wide awake. Why not you?

Yikes. I winced. I wanted to ignore it. I don’t want that answer. I tried closing my eyes. That feels way too bold. Too intense. Far too brave for what I’m feeling right now… or is it?

Ephesians 3:19-21
19 and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
20 Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

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Comments

Gail8nelson

What a testimony of Faith, Elly. ❤️
  • 7 months ago

Diane Fahrenkrug

Rollercoaster are no fun for me. This one is definitely feels like it is off the rails. I am praying and praying for you and your family! I am praying for the medical team too. Hugs and love!
Diane
  • 7 months ago

Diane Fahrenkrug

Rollercoaster are no fun for me. This one is definitely feels like it is off the rails. I am praying and praying for you and your family! I am praying for the medical team too. Hugs and love!
Diane
  • 7 months ago

Rhonda Stasaitis

Our devotion this morning was Psalms 91. I thought of you. “Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. …14 “Because he loves me” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; l will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.”
We continue in prayer for you and your family as you go through this journey. 💖
  • 7 months ago

Tonya Gripentrog

This is my favorite bible first.Be still and know that l am God.Psalm46:10
  • 7 months ago

Madeleine Cassidy

God loves you and is for you, Elly. God is still good.

I'm praying for you always.
  • 7 months ago

Jeanette Coletta

This piece of writing of your heart’s cries is art. Art of the messiness of this journey. You are digging up your garden, Elly. God is going to grow beautiful things out of it. Today we sit in the dirt and rainstorm with you and just encourage you that this will bloom in due time. You are not alone. Your feelings today are all valid and important to spread on the soil of your testimony. Love you.
  • 7 months ago

Dorimar Olivera

Wow. Thank you for sharing this Elly.
  • 7 months ago

Carol.gray927

Elly, I love you. I will not stop praying for you. I have been praying for healing and peace. I cannot imagine the struggles you are feeling. I will continue to pray for peace and calmness for you. You are an amazing woman.
  • 7 months ago

Chara Brightly

Whatever brings him glory. If being healed brings him glory. Thank you, Jesus!!! If going through tribulations brings him glory, thank you, Jesus!!!! Sending you more hugs and continuing to pray.
  • 7 months ago

Mrs.brightly

James 1:2
  • 7 months ago

Mrs.brightly

James 1:2

That goes with my other post.
  • 7 months ago

Jessica Solan

Girl praying so hard for you, I can’t imagine what you all are going through but praying for peace, trust, understanding and healing. I truly believe what they say God doesn’t give you more than you can handle but sometimes we just can’t understand how. Reading what you wrote, wow a true testament to those around you!
  • 7 months ago

Jaylene Hardtke

Oh Elly, I will pray the scriptures over you as well as come against that cancer that is attacking your body. Praying also for you to find rest!🙏💕🙏💕 You and Jesus got this!
  • 7 months ago

Meagan Baugher

Elly, your faith is truly beautiful. ❤️
  • 7 months ago

Katy Nelson

Sooo, note to self, pray for Elly’s sleep before you go to bed, not just at 3:30 when you’re up to go to the bathroom.

Middle of the night potty breaks are great prayer times. And today I was brought to tears thinking about the trauma of the unveiling. It’s hard to know what to say. So if I just pray and cry with you, I trust God will bring peace, healing, and comfort. Praying for your three boys, too.

Looking forward to part two….💛
  • 7 months ago